Hi friends! If you’re anything like me, you’re eagerly awaiting James Matthews and Pippa Middleton’s wedding this weekend. There’s so much buzz around the upcoming nuptials, including this hilarious piece by Craig Brown of the Daily Mail. Craig wrote up some tongue-in-cheek wedding tips that would supposedly be from Pippa herself (it’s a parody of course) and I just had to share it. Be sure to check out the full piece, but here are some of my favorite “tips” from Craig!
- Wedding proposals traditionally take place on bended knee. But if a man bends his knee, it does not necessarily mean that he is making a marriage proposal. He may just be picking up a piece of litter, tying his shoelace, or weeding the garden, in which case it is best to say nothing.
- Wondering what to wear for your wedding? Solve the problem by putting on a ‘wedding dress’. This is a dress specially designed to be worn at your wedding — hence the name.
- Wedding invitations should include the name of the bride and the groom, so that guests know in advance who they are going to see getting married.
- Many brides like to carry a bunch of flowers. Potted plants are best avoided. Carrying anything larger than a rhododendron bush or Christmas tree might also make your walk down the aisle awkward and uncomfortable, unless you have hired special ‘helpers’ in advance.
- The long bit at the back of a bride’s dress is known as the ‘train’. Traditionally, it is not a real train, as this could hamper progress, particularly if it fails to run on time. Also, a real train might be full of commuters who, strictly speaking, have not been invited to the wedding.
- If your bridesmaid steps on your train by mistake or ‘accidentally on purpose’, just give it a quick tug and she will be sent flying.
- Confetti is traditionally made of lightweight material. Anything weighing 1lb or over is best avoided.
So funny, right? Remember to check out the rest of these super useful tips at the following link: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-4509290/Pippa-s-tips-wedding-planning-CRAIG-BROWN.html#ixzz4hGWiuaEF